The lady gasped when I supplied the information that she desired, the price of a photo session. I pointed out that the session fee included a free, framed print and a generous usage credit towards her choice of finished photographs, making the actual session fee pretty negligible. I do not think that she understood and never got as far as explaining why I am a different kind of photographer.
I have wondered before whether I could train the cats to answer the telephone. You may argue that paws are incompatible with buttons on telephones but I could do the physical manipulation, say “would you like to speak to the cat?” and hand over. My cats could then charm prospective clients and lure them into the studio without giving away any tangible information.
Cats are greatly misunderstood. Contrary to popular belief, cats are very sociable and crave to be part of the family. Mine are always around me and they are always interested in what I am doing, especially if it involves moving heavy objects, which could crush a cat in an instant, balancing precariously on a ladder or drilling holes into walls; preferably all three activities performed simultaneously.
Come to think of it, they are probably no good at answering telephone calls. Cats are born bosses, good with management but not with the actual doing. When I brought in some flowers from the garden the other day to arrange them tastefully with a cup of coffee, Kaspar was quick to help with the exact placement and to advise me on my choice of flowers. I think he approved.
The telephone enquiry was a lose-lose situation. I am no good at selling and the prospective client was no good at buying. How lucky I am to have cats, who tell me what to do in all other aspects of my life.
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See more about animal portraiture on my website.
To arrange a photo session for your animals (or for yourself), please contact me. If you call, please be gentle – you know that I am no good at selling.